There are a few things that can lead to cracks in a relationship or marriage. Once the devil sees a crack, he can capitalize on it and gain an entrance. Once the devil sees an inch, he takes a mile.This morning, we will be looking at some sensitive spots that can easily lead to cracks. We are to consciously prevent this from happening. Life is all about deliberate and strict adherence to godly principles, which you allow to guide your life.
1. When communication is reduced or stopped both in courtship and marriage, it is not always a good sign when the communication reduces or is stopped. You have to consciously work at it. Even when you have some quarrel, or there is a disagreement, you need to know that you are still married or you are still going to get married. Remember this, when you lose communication between each other, assumptions will become the order of the day. Assumptions are the lowest forms of knowledge because they are mostly untrue and exaggerated. A relationship or marriage that feeds from assumption will soon crack. Communicate deliberately. Never say you are too busy. Life is all about value. If you value that relationship or marriage, you will find time and invest communication in it. Someone was once asked what the three most important ingredients of marriage are. He said the first is communication, the second is communication and the third is communication. I agree with him.
2. When friendship is not pursued.
In courtship or marriage, when friendship is not pursued, it will not really last. Friends may disagree but they always settle. Real friends will not kill each other. Real friends watch out for each other’s back. Real friends will forgive each other easily. So I tell people, marry your friend, and you would have minimized conflicts, hate and bickering. There is a difference between marrying a friend and marrying your acquaintance.
3. When sincerity and transparency is zero.
A relationship or marriage founded on falsehood and deception will leave the crack wide for the devil to explore and plunder. Be sincere to each other. Sincerity will ensure trust. Without trust, your relationship or marriage will be full of too many suspicions, which are not healthy for a good union. If your fiancé lies, then he will do more after marriage. Marriage rarely changes anybody. He that worketh deceit shall not dwell within my house: he that telleth lies shall not tarry in my sight. (Psalms 101:7 KJV)Let’s take a look at Message Translation:But no one who traffics in lies gets a job with me; I have no patience with liars. I've rounded up all the wicked like cattle and herded them right out of the country. (Psalms 101:7 Message)
4. When the wife is muted and expression is not allowed.
When you don’t allow your wife to express herself, you are building up molten magma within, and the day there would be an eruption, you might not be able to handle it. For a lady, expressing herself regularly is not just a hobby but a need. There are some courtships where the lady is not allowed to say anything, well, that is a defective relationship. That need of free expression must be met. If you really want the ‘helper’ in her to come forth, you should learn to let her express herself.
5. When the man is sexually starved.
You don’t ever use Jeru Trips as a reward or punishment for your husband. It is a legitimate need that every man has. During courtship, pre-marital relation is not allowed for several obvious reasons. You cannot use Jericho trap to secure a relationship. It will never work that way, and it is not about to work in your own time. What will make your relationship work and successfully lead to marriage are firstly, your relationship with God coupled with your obedience and secondly working together at forgiving each other and treating each other tenderly.
May God grant more understanding!
Culled from KHC Kisses&Huggs.(DUNAMIS & SOPHIA)
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