:::::::GREAT TRUTHS:::::::::

ABOUT GROWING OLD :
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
Forget the health food. You need all the preservatives you can get.
When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.
I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today it's called golf.
If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old.
I finally got my head together; now my body is falling apart.
Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...


THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:

You believe in Father Christmas
You don't believe in Father Christmas
You are Father Christmas
You look like Father Christmas.